Nate Holdridge

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How to Counsel Yourself (Nehemiah 5:7)

"I took counsel with myself..." (Nehemiah 5:7)

Bobby Brown once sang, "I talk to myself when there is no one to talk to." Nehemiah talked to himself when there were others to talk to. The dude had enemies, and frienemies, who tried to bring him down.

At times, their plots and schemes overwhelmed the man. So Nehemiah prayed, put his head down, kept moving, and, sometimes, took counsel with himself.

I hope you can become your greatest counselor. As the Word of God drills down into your soul, I pray your self-advice begins to mirror that which you find in the Bible. We all need counsel and direction, and God's Word, along with godly people, can aid us. We need stable and strong voices inputting into our lives.

But, on the fly, Nehemiah had to counsel himself. He had to "take 5" and have a short business meeting with himself. And he gave himself great counsel. Because of it, the wall of Jerusalem got built.

As the Scripture has gotten into my heart over the years, my self-counsel has improved. Here are some questions, some of which I've gleaned from others, which have helped me counsel myself:

1. What does the cross of Christ say to me about this situation?

There are times the death of Christ, His willingness to suffer so others might thrive, is all I need to know. With his cross in mind, my self-counsel becomes clear. Life is a series of decisions. Often, the Lord asks His people to die a little for the betterment of others. Looking to the cross helps fuel the kind of counsel that would say, "Go for it. Sacrifice for them."

2. What would I tell a friend in this situation?

I often waffle in my own decision making, but with friends, I can be bold, clear, and encouraging. Though I like to show them both sides, or a new angle, of potential decisions, I am usually able to offer a clear word to them. With this in mind, I sometimes ask questions like: What would I say to another husband about this? Another father? Another pastor?

3. How will I feel about this in ten minutes, months, years, or in an eternity?

Many decisions in life, especially the sacrificial kind, push us out of our comfort zone. But, by taking the long view, we can get a little more perspective on what's happening in the immediate. In ten minutes a guy might be happy with his decision to play video games for three hours, but he might not be as pleased about it in ten months, and certainly, in ten years and eternity he won't be thankful for the time he spent mastering the newest Call of Duty.

4. Is this who God has made me to be?

God shapes people in different ways. The Spirit distributes gifts individually as he wills. Pastors, for one, come in various packages. If I try to decide what my life will look like by comparing myself to others, I will build my life amiss. Instead, it is good to ask, is this how God designed me?

5. Are there fears or worries for which I'm not trusting God?

Let's not make decisions out of fear or worry or insecurity. Let's be like Joshua and Caleb, bold men who believed God would give Israel the victory over their gigantic enemies. God is faithful. Let's trust Him.